Tuesday, January 16, 2007

The Twat in the Hat. As inspired by the great Grannys.Myth.Peeler

Sitting at home, I'm feeling quite low,
The reason? Tomorrow to work I must go.
There in my chair I shall sit and review,
The masses and masses of jobs on my queue.

As I sit there, sorting tit out from tat,
I see him approaching, the Twat in the hat!
Oh no! He will meddle. He'll turn things to poo.
Assisted of course by Dick 1 and Dick 2!

Around PC Fact, the three of them prey,
Checking up on what he's doing today.
To pick him to pieces, to pull him to bits.
But he knows of their scheming, those trio of shits!

Defeated for now, the Twat skulks along.
To sit in his office, the sad fucking mong.
I'm sure you've all have them, Bosses that talk tat.
A Dick 1, a Dick 2, and a Twat in a hat.

Lets all keep on hoping, Please God, not in vain.
That Dick 1 and Dick 2 and the Twat all get slain.
And so on that nice thought, to your views I'll react.
To all of you bloggers, Nuff respect, Franky Fact!!

7 comments:

Annette said...

This is excellent.
very funny.

Robert 'Bob' Slot said...

Excellent, Always loved Dr Seuss as a kid, can't wait for 'The Twat in the Hat came Back" and "Cocks in Socks" (Or is that last one about something else?)

Anonymous said...

Yes, you are clearly as mad as the rest of us. Well done. It's not easy.

Anonymous said...

I am honoured brother. excellent ballad.

you is mad as cheese.

TotallyUn-Pc said...

ok ok.... poet laureat in post... now, whats this about a rat and a pencil please?

Twining says: said...

Now, this made me smile. Well done! Cat in the hat is a film and my daughther loves it. Anyone seen kangaroo Jack? I have to agree, you are a brother as you you Myth Peeler.

Twining says: said...

Chief: Twining we need you to go to Hertfordshire. We have a problem.

Twining: We do? OK boss, it's Big brother right?. Who do I take with me?

Chief: Shhh, don't tell everyone. Pick your team.

Twining: Er OK, I want Bloggs interviewing with me, Inspector G to oversee this and I want to be able to check things out with Frankyfact and Southwest.

Chief: I grant you your wish. Can you sort this for me? For the service? For Britain. For the World.

Twining: Boss. We the A team will do our best. Just for you that is.

Chief: No one must know.

(It's Ok i though hmm I won't tell anyone who Inspector G is! Because I don't know who he is myself and we shall all be wearing batman, robin and batwoman outfits.) So off we went, all of us. Southwest drove the van, Inspector G was ready at the helm of the van, whilst I sat in between the two. In the back of the van was Frankyfact and Myth Peeler had somehow got a ride. WT I thought...With tape machine and pen board in the van, and additional flip charts we made our way to Hertfordshire. Adorning fans of Inspector G laid flowers at his feet, this being an old Indian custom. Mr Man's wife was there! The ladies loved Southwest, some even loved Bloggs, and Frankyfact and Myth Peeler were like two coiled dogs. But no one knew me, Black in Blue, no one knew me!